Overthinking your decisions is stressful and exhausting. Whether you’re trying to decide whether to change jobs, leave a relationship, or have a difficult conversation, constantly replaying every option and second-guessing yourself keeps you feeling stuck.
In this guide, you’ll learn why smart, capable women often struggle with decision-making, real client stories, how Hypnosis can help you trust yourself again, and two self-hypnosis techniques you can use when you need to make an important decision.
While everyone is different, here are some common issues people experience when making decisions:
People have many different reasons for being indecisive. Some common reasons include:
Sometimes you’re consciously aware of the reasons you’re indecisive, but more often you aren’t.
Hypnotherapy can help you uncover unconscious reasons that have been holding you back, as well as help you change patterns and causes you’re already aware of. (I use the terms Hypnotherapy, Hypnosis, and trance interchangeably.)
Good decision-making isn’t just about having more information. It’s also about the state of mind you’re in when you make the decision.
None of us can. Life is constantly changing, and so are we.
Many of my clients find themselves “future-tripping,” trying to solve problems that don’t even exist yet, instead of working with the information you have today.
When you’re stressed, your brain focuses on potential threats instead of possibilities. That’s why everything can feel so much more black and white when you’re overwhelmed.
You’re using the dominant hemisphere of your brain, while the sub-dominant hemisphere—where your creativity and intuition are, is less accessible.
That’s one reason Hypnosis can be so helpful. By helping you shift out of fight-or-flight and into a calmer, more resourceful state, you can access more of your mind, reconnect with your intuition, and make decisions from a place of greater clarity.
So how does Hypnosis help you stop overthinking and trust yourself?
Hypnosis helps you use both parts of your brain, by activating the sub-dominant hemisphere. This makes it easier to access your intuition and creativity, so you can feel calmer, think more clearly, and reconnect with yourself.
Hypnosis also helps us reinterpret problems, noticing what’s new and different. This is often when the “aha” moment happens and you come up with solutions you never even considered before.
Hypnosis is an easy way to pay attention to your own internal resources using a state of focused awareness. If you have ever watched tv, experienced the zone state during running, or used a bedtime story to help a child get to sleep, you’ve experienced a trance state like the techniques used in Hypnotherapy.
Hypnosis can quiet the mental noise so you can relax, access more of your own inner resources, and approach decisions with greater clarity.
We’ll work with the real decisions you’re facing, so you experience what it feels like to stop second-guessing yourself and start trusting your own judgment.
I’ll also teach you personalized Self-Hypnosis techniques you can use whenever an important decision comes up, so instead of getting caught in endless analysis, you’ll have a quick and practical way to calm your mind and access your own best thinking.
Here’s a simple, yet game-changing question, I learned from the brilliant Hypnosis trainer John Overdurf. You can ask yourself this question whenever you’re trying to make a decision.
Before you ask yourself this question, take a moment to get into a relaxed state of mind. You might close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, or spend a few minutes meditating to center yourself.
(Hypnosis and meditation have many similarities, as well as some key differences.)
Then ask yourself this question:
So often we think too big picture, and we become overwhelmed and stressed. I’ve learned to ask myself this question whenever I’m working on a big project (or whenever I have a lot of different things to do) and find it a gamechanger.
It’s such a simple question, yet it’s a powerful and easy way to redirect your attention and interrupt the overwhelm that often comes with big decisions.
Asking yourself this simple question will give you more up-to-date information to use, because you and the world around you is always changing.
Once you’ve completed this next smallest step, then you can repeat the question, step by step, working toward figuring out what you want to do and improving your decision-making skills as you go.
One of the most common questions I hear is, “How do I stop second-guessing myself and connect with my intuition?” Hypnosis is one of my favorite ways to help with both.
Intuition is an important part of good decision-making. Hypnosis can help you strengthen your intuition, and Distance Reiki and Tao Hands can support this process as well.
Connecting with your heart is one of the fastest ways I know to tune into your intuition and gain greater clarity about the decisions that are right for you. This is one reason I usually focus on the heart when working with clients in my Soul-Powered Breakthrough Program.
In Chinese medicine, the heart houses the mind and is the receiver of your soul’s wisdom, so the more open and balanced it is, the more intuitive guidance you’ll be able to receive to help you with any aspect of your life.
When you’re under pressure, second-guessing yourself, or trying to think your way to the perfect answer, it becomes much harder to recognize what you already know. As your connection to your heart grows stronger, you naturally stop looking outside yourself for every answer and begin trusting your own judgment again.
Want to try it yourself? I share the Heart Breathing technique I use with clients, along with the science behind it, here.
While Hypnosis plays an important role in helping clients make decisions with greater confidence, it’s just one part of how I work one-on-one in the Soul-Powered Breakthrough Program.
Both Reiki and Tao Hands can help you connect to your intuition and inner wisdom. Reiki helps by clearing energy blocks that can leave you feeling stuck or in a holding pattern when you’re trying to make an important decision. Tao Hands helps address the root cause through soul healing.
According to my teacher and the creator of Tao Hands, Dr. & Master Sha, “the soul is the boss.”
When your connection to your soul is strong, your heart can more easily receive the information from your soul, your mind can interpret it more clearly, and you can take action to manifest what you want.
Similar to Hypnosis, both Reiki and Tao Hands help you transition out of fight-or-flight mode into parasympathetic, rest-and-digest mode. In this way, using Reiki and Tao Hands can help you trust your intuition and make decisions from a calmer, more grounded place.
If you’d like to learn more, here are two articles on learning Reiki and Tao Hands for self-healing and decision-making.
One of my favorite perspectives on intuition comes from bestselling author Glennon Doyle.
In Untamed, she talks about a practice she calls “How to Know.” I often share it alongside John Overdurf’s “next smallest step” technique because both help shift your attention away from overthinking and indecision, taking it one step at a time, so you can tap into your intuition.
Rather than me telling you what’s possible, I thought it would be more helpful to have a few clients tell you in their own words.
Felt REALLY relieved after I met with you… I’m still obsessing a little bit about my relationship but what’s different is I know I will figure it out. I feel better and am more okay with not knowing what will happen and not being scared of my intuition. –A.J.
Deborah’s energy lifts and shifts you. Get ready to focus and feel happy! I made all the decisions I needed to make about whether to move to another country. Amazing and relaxing experience. My higher self is awakened. –E.K.
Deborah helped me process a major life decision and I’ve been feeling positive about it ever since. I recommend her 100%. –K.M.
Deborah helped me out of a major creative block and deal with significant stress. After my first session, I felt totally centered, calm, and open to my own creativity. On follow-up sessions, Deborah helped me learn to listen to my intuition and focus on my goals. She also gave me easy do-it-yourself techniques to use in stressful situations.
–L.K.
Flower essences can gently help balance your emotions, making it easier to approach decisions with greater clarity and trust in yourself. You can learn more about what flower essences are, how they work, and the different ways to use them here.
Here are a few of my favorite flower essences for decision-making and strengthening your intuition. I can also make personalized recommendations during your Breakthrough Program.
If you’re tired of overthinking every decision and you’re ready to trust yourself with greater clarity and confidence, I’d love to help.
I work with high-achieving women all over the world through my virtual one-on-one Soul-Powered Breakthrough Program.
If you’re new to Hypnosis or curious to learn more, the articles below answer some of the questions I hear most often.
Most people expect Hypnosis to feel very different than it actually does. Learn 10 common signs you're entering a trance.
Discover why Hypnosis can create lasting change, what secondary gain is, and why it sometimes keeps people stuck.
Wondering if Hypnosis really works? Discover what to expect, the two signs that often make people think it didn't, and why those signs can actually be part of the process.
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● Shake off the stress and feel calm
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Burned out by an all-consuming job, Deborah Flanagan found balance and peace through the healing arts — and now she's helping others do the same.
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